The OBABO and BAOAB schemes and the other standard Strang splittings of kinetic (underdamped) Langevin dynamics are widely used Markov chain Monte Carlo algorithms. Under a suitable friction scaling, the underlying diffusion relaxes on a ballistic time scale, suggesting that these discretizations, suitably tuned, sample targets with condition number $κ$ in $O(\sqrtκ)$ iterations. We prove that no fixed choice of step size and friction, based only on the curvature bounds and the dimension, achieves this acceleration: total variation mixing time lower bounds for OBABO show that ballistic cold-start mixing fails uniformly over the smooth strongly convex class, and the lower bounds extend, with the same orders, to BAOAB and the other four Strang splittings. The proof transfers non-acceleration from optimization to sampling. Eliminating velocity gives an exact noisy heavy-ball recursion, and by the non-acceleration theorem of Goujaud, Taylor and Dieuleveut, for every tuning either some Gaussian target has a mode with relaxation time at least of order $κ$, or an attracting cycle exists on a smooth potential; dilating such a potential as $U_R(x)=R^2U(x/R)$ preserves its curvature bounds and produces metastability for a number of steps exponential in $R^2$, from an initial state at Wasserstein distance $O(R)$ from equilibrium. Using contraction estimates of Leimkuhler, Paulin and Whalley and a Wasserstein-to-total-variation regularization estimate, we prove a complementary upper bound of $O(κ)$ steps, up to logarithmic factors, for a fixed-parameter OBABO tuning. Hence, among fixed-parameter OBABO tunings, the optimal condition-number dependence of cold-start total variation mixing over this class is linear, up to logarithmic factors. A direct Gaussian calculation also rules out fixed-parameter acceleration for the left-endpoint exponential integrator.
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